Well that didn’t last long

Friday, October 29, 2010

This morning I had an appointment with a mom who has a baby.  Watching her interact with her baby… watching her play with her baby… watching her comfort her baby…

I came home and cried at lunch.

I want that.  I want a baby to take care of, and nurture, and comfort.  Foster or biological, I don’t care.  But I want a baby.


Still waiting to hear back about my husband’s job interview.  I don’t want to send in our application for fost-adopt until he has a job.  Because *I* want to be the primary caregiver.  And if he’s not working, then that leaves him to be the primary caregiver.  Because I’ll need to bring home the money.  I’m still praying that he gets this job.  But I’m starting to lose hope.


I just want a baby.



  1. Wait for that baby but make some noise with the higher ups and bother them. Keep calling. The squeaky wheel, you know. People I know that got their babies via foster care make lots of phone calls, ppl started to want them to go away so they jumped to the top of whatever list in the sky they have.

  2. Sending you lots of hugs. It’s so hard. You feel strong enough to walk through fire one day and then the next day something little knocks you on your *ss.

    I hope your baby finds you soon. And that your DH gets the job. And that things just start turning your way.

  3. I can very much relate to your last couple of posts. Most things seem to roll off my back these days for many aspects of this IF crap. I think it is a lot of the things I have just learned to get used to through repeated beatings.

    And then there will be something that hits me from out of left field and the tears just roll and roll. No real rhyme or reason. Sometimes it just sucks.

    Sending hugs, hope that your hubby gets the job, and that the next stage of this process goes a little easier for you.

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